Q What are The Rules?
A They are a simple, structured approach to dating that 1) filters out men who are ambivalent, unreliable or unavailable, 2) paces relationships so men don’t burn out and lose interest and 3) creates mystique and aura that help make men fall in love with you. The Rules were gathered and published by authors Ellen Fein and Scherrie Schneider, who’ve also released follow-up books like The Rules II, The Rules for On-Line Dating and The Rules for Marriage.
Q What about more general dating advice? Do you only coach women who are doing The Rules?
A I can help you develop or improve a relationship -- whether or not you’re doing The Rules. You do not have to read or do The Rules to benefit from our coaching. That said, I do specialize in Rules advice, and believe it’s the sanest, safest, and surest path to long-term romantic bliss, so while it’s not “required reading,” it is highly recommended!
Q I’m already in a relationship and just learned about The Rules. What should I do?
A Start doing The Rules -- or at least the most important ones. You’ll find out quickly whether this man wants to marry you, or whether he’s just wasting your time.
Q What are the most important rules?
A Don’t talk to a man first, don’t ask him out, don’t initiate the relationship, and let him take the lead. Be more mysterious, open up slowly, don’t talk so much. Oh, and of course, be a creature unlike any other -- the most feminine, sexy, and put-together you can be!
Q If I do The Rules -- hang up after 10 minutes, rarely return his calls --won’t he think I’m mean? Or uninterested?
A Repeat this Rules mantra: Warm words, cool actions. You are as sweet as sugar when you turn him down for a last minute date. You’ve really enjoyed talking to him, but you have to get off the phone. Setting boundaries is not mean. It shows self-respect.